How to Attend Military Command Holiday Parties

Command-sponsored holiday parties--don't you just love them? The rank and file cluster in banquet halls like hungry water buffalo while grazing through soggy hors d'ouvres and waiting too long in line for a drink. Lacking the homey coziness of a small division house party, command get-togethers call for quite a bit of attention to detail. If you aren't well-versed on how to present yourself at these "mandatory fun" events, here's the crucial short list.

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Step1
Dress appropriately. If the party is held in a classy upscale atmosphere, make an effort not to show up looking as if you just left Hooter's during halftime. What you wear says a lot about you personally and professionally, especially when you are out of uniform in public among your peers.


Step2
Drink in moderation. No matter how much you might enjoy wearing the proverbial lampshade when you let your hair down at private parties, a command function is not an appropriate place to demonstrate how much alcohol you are capable of consuming in order to make a fool of yourself.


Step3
Park domestic or work-related conflicts outside the door. There's nothing worse than trying to converse with someone at a party who can't stop obsessing over personal problems. If you hate the way the division is run, save it for the water cooler. Troubles are considered off limits at command celebrations.


Step4
Watch what you say and in whose company you say it. As sure as the sun will rise the morning after the command party, there will be those who enjoy keeping the rumor mill primed with juicy half-truths. Count on any comments you make to be taken completely out of context and used against you later if you don't know your audience extremely well.


Step5
Refrain from spending more time with officers or senior-enlisted personnel attached to your command than you normally would. In other words, if you speak with the Command Master Chief at most five minutes a day, spend only five minutes speaking to him at the command party. Avoid sitting down at a higher-ranking person's table unless he or she specifically invites you to sit.


Step6
Take advantage of the social atmosphere by making a point to introduce yourself while mingling with people you would like to get to know at the command. Avoid isolating yourself by sitting in the corner. For instance, if you work in Engineering and occasionally see in passing someone from the Deck Department, walk up with your hand extended and warmly say, "Hello."


Step7
Introduce your spouse or partner to each individual you come into contact with at the event. Remember, he or she may be unfamiliar with military protocol, so be sure to ease the way by helping with the etiquette involved. A command party is definitely the wrong time to go and hang with the guys, leaving your partner to sit alone. Include him or her actively in the conversation.


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